A Ring for Sarah

November 9, 2011 by Celia @ Fig Jam and Lime Cordial

I’ve bought a ring for Sarah.

She passed away last week, after an extended battle with cancer. She was Pete’s cousin, and my friend.

Sarah was warm, funny and above all, honest – both with her words and her feelings. My occasional phone conversations with her would lower my heart rate, in the same way that settling into a comfy lounge or sipping hot tea does. I found her incredibly easy to talk to – words would tumble out, and our discussions would meander through the antics of our children, the quirky ups and downs of our everyday lives, and family happenings.

We met nearly twenty years ago, at Pete’s grandmother’s house. We both adored the old lady, and a few years later, formulated a mad plan to rescue her from the nursing home when she became too infirm to live on her own. It was never going to happen, of course, but that was Sarah’s way – lead with the heart, and try to figure out the details later.

We lived in different cities, so we only saw her every few years or so. She and I would chat once or twice a year on the phone, often for an hour or more, and then be caught up on each other’s lives. The last conversation we had was just a couple of weeks before she died, and it was a short one, as she was weak and struggling to talk. Even then, she wanted to know how we all were, what we planned to do for Christmas, how the kids were going at school. She always made us feel like we were special to her.

She had just fifty-three years of life, but it was so full of good things. A lot of pain too, but I think she’d have said that the good stuff far outweighed the hard times. She had wonderful parents, sisters who were her best friends, and a loving husband and children who adored her. She had a rewarding and creative career, great friends, and a community that supported her.

Sarah darling, you were loved so dearly by so many. Truly, you had a life well lived.

And so I bought a ring for Sarah. A big chunky sterling silver ring, which fills up my whole hand. Whenever I wear it, I will remember the times that she made me laugh until I cried, and how I would relay the stories to Pete, and then he too, would laugh until tears came. I will remember the times when I was struggling with Small Man’s illness, and Sarah would just listen, without judgment or endless advice. I will remember the dozen or so meals we shared, the handmade Christmas cards, the blankets we traded for artwork, and the sheer joy of having known her.

Rest in peace, Sarah. You will be missed more than you could ever have imagined.

Posted in Musings | 49 Comments

49 Responses

on November 9, 2011 at 6:44 am sallybr

The ring is beautiful, it depicts connection, union, friendship. A special bond.

But your text is even more beautiful, and very very touching.

a warm hug going your way, Celia…
on November 9, 2011 at 6:47 am ceciliag

Darling that is wonderful and such a gorgeous thing to do. I am really impressed. Beautiful. You will smile every time you wear it which makes remembering her a joyful thing. c
on November 9, 2011 at 6:47 am well cooked life

So sorry to hear about your loss. Sounds like the world’s loss, actually, as people who gift the gift of laughter are so needed. I wear my stepmum’s huge ring and think of her in the same way. Sending warmth.
on November 9, 2011 at 6:51 am InTolerant Chef

So sorry for the loss of such a loved friend Celia. It sounds like you and Sarah enriched each others lives in a beautiful way. The ring is lovely, what a nice way of showing how much you valued Sarah and how much you loved her too. Beautiful.
on November 9, 2011 at 6:56 am Claire @ Claire K Creations

Celia I’m so sorry for your loss. That is a wonderful story. You were very lucky to have such a special lady in your life and I hope that the ring makes you smile every time you remember her. x
on November 9, 2011 at 6:56 am Nicki Molloy

Your post has rendered me to tears, the ring an outward symbol of somene so special and the hold she will have in your heart….gorgeous. This year my loss has been so great, my mother. I too wear a ring, one that was hers and it is a lovely outward reminder of someone so special. Peace and hugs to you. Nicki
on November 9, 2011 at 7:11 am Peter Bryenton

Well expressed rememberances and a fine way to honour such a friend. Some lives touch ours to very great effect.
on November 9, 2011 at 7:26 am Joanna

Bless you dearest. I am so sorry that you and Pete and the boys have lost such a dear person and I am very moved by your writing. xx
on November 9, 2011 at 7:42 am Rose

My condolences Celia. That’s a lovely way to honour Sarah.
on November 9, 2011 at 7:58 am Mariana

Your post has been a timely reminder that life is precious. So sorry for your loss.
on November 9, 2011 at 8:06 am Misk Cooks

A lovely tribute, and a beautiful ring.
on November 9, 2011 at 8:06 am Kavey

I’m so sorry for your loss, yours, Pete’s and the whole family’s.
The ring is beautiful, which sounds very fitting for your friend.
x
on November 9, 2011 at 8:30 am spiceandmore

Sarah sounds like a very special person who will be missed by many. A nice tribute to her Celia. Hugs to you all in this time of sadness.
on November 9, 2011 at 8:35 am Lee

A good friend and a lovely story. If only we could all aspire to produce the same effects and emotions, in life and in remembrance, the world would be a much better place.
on November 9, 2011 at 8:59 am Amanda

What a lovely tribute to someone who was clearly very important in your life, Celia. I wish you strength and happy memories at this difficult time.
on November 9, 2011 at 9:19 am Vita

Am so sorry for your loss. Sounds like you have lost an amazing friend. She will always be with you. The ring is a lovely way to honour her.
xx
on November 9, 2011 at 10:41 am Keri

Beautiful words for a beautiful lady Celia, I didn’t know her but feel like I do from the picture you painted with your words. Wear that ring warmly and she will always be with you.

Keri L x
on November 9, 2011 at 11:03 am heidi

Oh Celia, you made me cry.
It is hard to lose someone who is close to your heart and life.
I understand so well – I wear several pieces of jewelry that belonged to my sister in memory, as well.
Sending you love and prayers.
on November 9, 2011 at 12:33 pm Roz

What a way to tribute someone. My John had a special brooch made from his mothers rings, we can both wear it.
on November 9, 2011 at 1:33 pm Nancy @ Roving Lemon's Big Adventure

What a wonderful tribute–both the ring and the post!
on November 9, 2011 at 1:43 pm Abby

Such a beautiful post…sending many hugs your way!
on November 9, 2011 at 2:21 pm theonlycin

A beautiful tribute, I wish you well to wear the ring. RIP Sarah.
on November 9, 2011 at 4:06 pm Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella

Oh Celia and Pete, I am so very sorry for your loss. RIP Sarah.
on November 9, 2011 at 4:48 pm Kate

I’m so sorry for your loss. It sounds as though she was a great person and a wonderful friend. It is such a lovely idea to hold onto your happy memories with such a beautiful tribute ring.
on November 9, 2011 at 6:04 pm thecompletecookbook

Such a beautiful tribute Celia! Such a beautiful ring to remember Sarah by and fashioned in such a way that it symbolises never ending love.
:-) Mandy
on November 9, 2011 at 6:51 pm Anna

We are very sorry for your loss of Sarah. Your post was beautiful, Celia. I have a power ring too. It was my Grandmother’s and I wear it to think of her and put on an extra layer of protection against the world.
on November 9, 2011 at 8:20 pm Jeannette

What lovely sentiments, expressed in a touching way. You have a lovely way with words, Celia.
on November 9, 2011 at 11:11 pm Sally

A really moving tribute. Thinking of you Celia. The ring is such a good idea too.
on November 9, 2011 at 11:14 pm Melanie

I am so sorry for the loss of your friend Celia. Sounds like she was very special indeed. What a beautiful ring to bring wonderful memories of her kindness and love. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Sending a big hug to you. xx
on November 10, 2011 at 2:20 am Marilyn

Oh Celia! I’m sorry that I never got to meet Sarah. She sounds like a gift. Sending good thoughts your way. Warm hugs to you, my friend.

Maz.
on November 10, 2011 at 2:59 am KK @ Preppy Pink Crocodile

I am truly so sorry for your loss! But what a fabulous way to remember her. She must be loving such a fun and unique tribute to your sweet friendship.

KK
on November 10, 2011 at 6:09 am Jenny

Another hug coming your way. The ring you chose reminds me of one of Sting’s lyrics…..

Round, like a circle in a spiral
Like a wheel within a wheel.
Never ending or beginning,
On an ever spinning wheel

Jenny
on November 10, 2011 at 6:43 am Sue

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, Celia. The ring is a lovely gesture.
on November 10, 2011 at 6:52 am cityhippyfarmgirl

Celia that’s a beautiful ring to remember a beautiful friend.
xxx
on November 10, 2011 at 8:41 am Christine

Oh, Celia, my heart goes out to you. To lose someone so special well before their time is so heart-wrenching. My very best thoughts and good wishes go out to you and Pete. Take comfort whenever you wear your beautiful ring of friendship in the good times you all shared together. xx
on November 10, 2011 at 3:00 pm Manuela

A lovely tribute, Celia. It moved me to tears. Our prayers are with you at this difficult time.
on November 10, 2011 at 8:32 pm Tandy

blessings Celia, to you and your family. I can tell she will be missed HUGS Tandy
on November 10, 2011 at 9:41 pm Janine

such a beautiful way to remember one so loved by you :) like others, the tribute brought a tear to my eye too.
on November 11, 2011 at 2:26 am Debra Kolkka

What a lovely way to remember a special friend.
on November 11, 2011 at 4:48 pm tania@mykitchenstories

This made me cry. How sad it is to have left already at 53 . It makes you want to hug every one you know…………
Good bye, Sarah
on November 13, 2011 at 5:09 am Choclette

Celia, that’s a lovely tribute to Sarah and to wear a ring for her is just such a good thing to do. It’s always sad to hear such news, but good to hear she had a life well lived.
on November 13, 2011 at 6:49 pm Sophie33

The ring is stunning & what a wonderful tribute to your friend, Sarah!
A truly moving post. I am sorry for your loss. I will be thinking of you.
on November 13, 2011 at 9:47 pm pinkpolkadotfood

I am so sorry to hear about your friend and I think the ring is a great idea! Hugs to you!
on November 14, 2011 at 9:56 am Norma

I am so sorry for your loss. My best friend, Carlos, has cancer and I try to keep strong, but know he has a short time. What a wonderful idea about purchasing the ring.
on November 14, 2011 at 10:49 pm Dzintra

I’m so sorry Celia…what a beautiful way to remember Sarah…she will always feel close for you when you wear this ring…Take care…sending a big hug to you through cyberspace xo
on November 15, 2011 at 12:00 am Celia @ Fig Jam and Lime Cordial

Thank you all for your kindness, and for taking the time to read about our friend Sarah. She was gorgeous; you would have loved her. xxx
on November 20, 2011 at 9:56 am Robyn

Celia, ever since I heard of Sarah’s death I’ve been thinking about her family, not realizing that you, Pete and the boys are part of it. Thinking of you all and your sad loss. Thanks for reminding me too, that we always have to focus on the joy life brings in the midst of challenge and difficulty. Love to you and the boys.
- on November 20, 2011 at 10:44 am Celia @ Fig Jam and Lime Cordial
  
  Thanks Rob. xxx
on November 22, 2011 at 3:17 am niasunset

This is a beautiful tribute and thing you did. I am sorry too for this beautiful lady of your friend. My prayers will be for her too. With my love, dear Celia,
nia