Yesterday, I walked from one end of Sydney to the other.
I started with lunch at Spice Alley with Big Boy and then walked all the way down George Street to buy a hat at The Rocks. I think it’s pretty cute…
As I walked down the main street of our busy city, I was struck by the number of homeless men and women asking for money. Most were sitting, staring at the ground – a couple were bent over on their knees, holding a cup above their heads. I felt sad and guilty, because like everyone else passing by, I’ll often pretend not to see them. It’s too confronting and discomforting.
We’ve all heard the warnings…
“They’re just using the money to buy drugs or alcohol”
“You’re perpetuating the problem if you give them money”
“It’s a racket, don’t fall for it…”
But yesterday, the little voice in my head was saying…
“You’re walking down to buy a hat you don’t really need, and stopping for a $4 coffee on the way..”
So I pulled all the loose change out of my purse and stuffed it into my coat pocket. As I passed each person, I dropped a few coins into his or her bowl. Without fail, he or she looked up, smiled and said “thank you”. I smiled back, and said “good luck to you”. Serendipitously, I had exactly the right number of coins to take me all the way down to Circular Quay.
I don’t have enough money to fix anyone else’s life, nor the emotional strength to shoulder their burdens. I think that’s where the guilt comes from – we see pain and suffering which we can’t fix, and then we feel bad because our lives are comfortable and easy by comparison. So we turn a blind eye, or explain it away, or worst of all, discredit the person suffering to try and make our more fortunate situations seem less unfair. All because we feel unable to make a meaningful difference.
Yesterday, I realised there was something I could do.
If you’re sleeping rough in a major city, my loose change will make very little difference to your financial situation. But what it will do is give me an opportunity to look you in the eye, and to wish you well. It will give me a reason to exchange a smile and a few words, and to interact with you as a fellow human being rather than walking past you, trying to pretend you don’t exist.
I rode the train home yesterday, in my new hat, remembering the faces of those I’d met that afternoon. I hope today is an easier day for all of them.
Fig Jam and Lime Cordial 
I was going to write what a truly, lovely person you are Celia. However, anyone who has ever had the good fortune to meet you, read things that you write or interacted with you in any way, would already know what a treasure you are. Preaching to the converted is pointless!
Touche’
Previous comment!
You know what, you’ve put a totally different spin on the situation and made me change my mind. You took the judgement out of a situation and made it about human connection. You are pretty wonderful Celia x
No one sits on a street unless desperate one way or the other: no one can change their yesterdays which has brought them to sit on a cold pavement. However they use the few pennies given is alright by me . . . but I agree that the human contact twixt giver and taker is the most important of all . . . wish everyone could read your simple story . . . wish everyone could consciously decide next time they walk past . . .
Well done, Celia. Sometimes opening your heart to people is as important as opening your wallet. You did both.
Cute hat.
Thank you Celia
I agree, Celia. We can’t fix the big problems of the world but we can do what ever little we can on our own patch and we can never know what has happened in their lives to bring them to that situation. I can never walk past and sometimes, if I have gone past, the little busy body on my shoulder makes me go back!
I agree wholeheartedly with these sentiments Celia. I also take a swag of coins and do likewise, knowing that it will make little difference in the long run. Is it my guilt money. If someone asks me for a dollar for a smoke, I hand it over too. I have never questioned how the homeless spend these meager offerings. Does anyone ever question middle class indulgent spending- on fine wine, painted toenails, leg waxing, take away coffee, fashion, Netflix, meals in restaurants or a spunky new hat? The homeless can do whatever they like with those gathered coins- and if they spend it on alcohol and drugs, well and good.I think I would too.
Well said Francesca. And a most thoughtful post from you, Celia
Lovely. Just lovely x
Yes it is awful how many of them there are Celia in our city on every side street as well. when I am doing tours on a Saturday I often put my spare change into peoples containers but I have to say with shame that I always give money to my favourite man on Pitt Street. The one with the rat. He is cheeky but very cheerful man and i can’t resist. He loves that rat so much he spends every waking minute with it except for Saturday night when his friend (with two cats) “babysits”for him and he has time off and watches TV.
Celia your change may not have fixed their problem, but more than the change, you acknowledged that they were there and they mattered. You gave them humanity. It must have made you feel pretty good too, we need more of that kindness in the world.
Thankyou Celia,
You told the truth so well. The lack of human connection and feeling like being invisible must be so corrosive to any remaining well being of the homeless.
Isn’t it a shock to see how many more homeless are on our streets even in the last year? If only we had more ‘granny flats’, we could easily get many unfortunate people into basic accommodation.
Thank you for recounting this and reminding us that there are too many people in the world that are down on their luck and that we can all help in some small way.
Several years ago, the company I worked with moved to an area just outside the financial district where homelessness was rampant. It was then some of the ladies decided to seek advice from the Salvation Army on how to handle ourselves passing by these people everyday. They said the most respectful thing we can do is to look them in the eyes when communicating with them, even if you’re saying you have nothing to give them. Ever since then, I have done this (going on 20 years) and only once I was told off with profanity! The other thing they suggested was to purchase a meal and leave it by their side as they slept. These people have little self esteem or self respect and by looking them in the eye, you give them respect.
thank you for sharing, we all need a reminder at times.. xxxo
Where we live, we don’t see any homeless persons, it is a small college town, these issues are not part of our daily routine
but when we travel to big cities, we are shocked to see so many desperate people are depending on the generosity of folks like us, who have no financial problems
I realize that many choose not to help because – you are reinforcing their behavior – I find that ridiculous, to tell you the truth. No one would opt for that kind of humiliation, day in day out, if the person did not run out of options.
so, yes, we make a point of giving. It makes us feel better, particularly when we are in town as tourists, enjoying what the place has to offer, light mind, with fun on our menu.
and I am sure it makes them feel much better too. A win win situation
A lovely balance of recognizing the humanity of the individual(s) and an awareness that is likely to be of as much help as the coins you provided to each one.
Beautiful post. Beautiful person. I have a pal who worked over Christmas with a charity that provides food and shelter for the homeless and as part of their training, they were told of how important and meaningful it is to make contact. Just a smile or a few words…just like you did.
I can’t resist giving money to people in the street. There used to be a lovely old man in Brisbane who slept rough. Instead of giving him money I used to buy him a sandwich. He always held my hand and said Thank you my dear, in a very cultured voice. I often wonder what happened to him. I don’t see many people asking for money in Brisbane, but they are everywhere in Italy. I admit to keeping my head down there sometimes.
Yes, just to acknowledge they are living people and being spoken to is the best we can do sometimes. Thank you Celia.
There are many homeless/beggars in the streets of my country as well. I was also often advised by other people not to give to them as it’s a scam they said, that the hungry little boy or hungry little girl in tattered clothes begging for money or food are members of an organized syndicate. I would listen to the advises before, especially when I was in Manila, because you’re not supposed to trust strangers in Manila or else you’ll get robbed or scammed. But it never felt right to ignore their pleas, especially the kids and old people. I always felt bad passing them by without giving them some money or food. So, I decided I will not pass them by without giving them something as often as I possibly can. I figured, it doesn’t really matter what they use it for as long as I’m giving and my heart is in the right place.
It breaks my heart to see a person begging. I always think ‘that’s somebody’s son or daughter’ and what lead them to be in that situation. A little money and a kind word goes a long way.
We have a huge homeless population in my town. We have the only soup kitchen in the county. Thanks for the kind advice, hugs, Maz.
It’s very sad that a few ‘bad beggars’ have spoiled things for those truly in need. As you have shown here a smile and a few kind words probably mean more than the coins. You are a truly wonderful human Celia 😃.
I think that giving to others who are homeless, it’s a way of saying, “I see you.” Perhaps those few coins won’t make a great deal of difference to circumstances, Celia, but I think they mean a lot because in lifting your eyes you are acknowledging a fellow human being as simply that, all judgement aside. Meg
I agree with this. Helping the homeless not only feels good, but it also creates a connection saying ” I got your back”. Personally, I like helping the homeless because we have all had struggles at some point in our life, some more than others. A simple four dollars can go a long way for someone stranded on the streets.
Lovely, and you are so correct. We feel helpless to change so much in the world. Your smile may have lightened some burdens, people want to be seen. Thank you for reminding us.
Sometimes I walk on the streets a few coins in my pocket, holding tight knowing that, that’s all I got for the day but when I pass near a begger, handicapped and disabled, I count the many blessings I have and give him all I had and hope that somehow my creater can see me through the day or just give me another way out. Be human because the world belongs to no one.
also correct the first sentence first paragraph….from from
thanks
Welcome
It shows the human in you. That was great.
I think you hit upon something really important. It’s not the loose change. It’s the eye contact and the act of giving that matters. It restores hope and respects basic humanity.
I agree with you helping people in need makes you feel happy but the thing is many in this crowd are fake, you think twice before helping them but then you should do what you feel right and leave the rest in the hands of God!
Well it feels really nice when I give some coins or money to the poor,and it really feels like in this world of darkness there is some light of humanity…