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Fig Jam and Lime Cordial

Living well in the urban village

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Something to make you laugh

April 2, 2020 by Celia @ Fig Jam and Lime Cordial

Please forgive the risque humour, but I think under current circumstances it’s warranted!

I have no idea where this came from, so my apologies for not giving due credit.

Oh, and here’s a photo of some ginger Pete grew in our backyard. It’s the closest I could come to a photo for this post.

ARE MY TESTICLES BLACK?

A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose.

A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.

“Nurse,”‘ he mumbles from behind the mask, “are my testicles black?”

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, Sir. I’m only here to wash your upper body and feet.”

He struggles to ask again, “Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?”

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.

She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other. She looks very closely and says, “There’s nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine.”

The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly, “Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very, closely:

“Are – my – test – results – back?”

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Posted in Food & Friends | 24 Comments

24 Responses

  1. on April 2, 2020 at 8:23 am Joanne V.

    Best laugh I’ve had today, Thank you Celia


  2. on April 2, 2020 at 8:29 am equipsblog

    Good one.


  3. on April 2, 2020 at 8:38 am Jacqui Fenner

    Love it!


  4. on April 2, 2020 at 8:38 am Theresa Clarkson-Farrell

    OH I laughed till I cried – Very funny! Just what the Dr ordered


  5. on April 2, 2020 at 9:38 am daleleelife101.blog

    I think the ginger photo is a good choice… I imagine to everyone’s relief :)


  6. on April 2, 2020 at 10:28 am nutsfortreasure

    lol


  7. on April 2, 2020 at 11:01 am Maureen Potter

    It did indeed make me laugh out loud!

    Mo


  8. on April 2, 2020 at 11:50 am bitemebypamtree

    We all need a laugh….and this did the trick!


  9. on April 2, 2020 at 12:22 pm Manuela

    πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ a good one!
    The ginger looks lovely. I wish my ginger would grow. Do you grow it in the garden or in pots?


    • on April 2, 2020 at 12:35 pm Nick Boland

      Here you go, Manuela.

      Very easy.


      • on April 3, 2020 at 8:39 am Manuela

        Thank you! I will try again; hopefully this time I can grow ginger. I think I have found my mistake.


  10. on April 2, 2020 at 12:49 pm Kim

    Nice one Celia!


  11. on April 2, 2020 at 1:56 pm Jan

    πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


  12. on April 2, 2020 at 2:13 pm Eva Taylor

    Thinking of you in Toronto. Loved that joke, thanks for the levity. Stay safe, stay well. XOXO


  13. on April 2, 2020 at 3:06 pm the eternal traveller

    Good one! :)


  14. on April 2, 2020 at 5:16 pm Anne Wheaton

    I wondered where this was going after the photo of the ginger and got the right direction! Very funny Celia. Keep them coming.


    • on April 2, 2020 at 5:19 pm Celia @ Fig Jam and Lime Cordial

      That’s because you have special insight into how my brain works.. 🀣


  15. on April 2, 2020 at 7:19 pm Kim Bultman

    Grinning, Celia! My hubby told me that one last week (truck drivers tend to share ribald jokes) and my daughter posted it on her FB page, but we don’t know where it originated either. Kudos to whoever came up with it. You’re right — we all need a lil’ humor these days. Thank you, xo.


  16. on April 3, 2020 at 10:14 am suth2

    Oh so good to get a laugh in these trying times. Thank you.


  17. on April 3, 2020 at 10:58 am Debbie Lee

    πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚


  18. on April 3, 2020 at 2:12 pm Liz @ spades, spatulas, and spoons

    Got me!!!


  19. on April 4, 2020 at 10:01 am Susan

    very funny!!!


  20. on April 5, 2020 at 8:19 am Carmel

    Oh my, what a belly laugh that’s given me! Thank you lovely lady. From a long time reader whose hard of hearing and can relate to this so well


  21. on April 6, 2020 at 7:46 pm Diane Campbell

    Well, if you are going to start a column on bad jokes… My jigsaw skills are getting better during this stay-at-home thing. The box said “3 to 5 years” and it took me only 2 days.



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